The Ava Blog

Archiving all the unbelievable actions and words that come from 4 year old Ava.

Monday, November 30, 2009

Ava and the Handsome Target Stranger

My older sister Desirie told me this story this past summer. She was pushing Ava in a shopping cart while she was browsing the shoe aisle of Target when she heard very loud squeaky footsteps along side of her. When she turned to look, she saw a very terrifying man. She described him as a look-a-like to the homeless criminal in the 1990's Dennis the Menace Movie. If you can imagine the stringy hair,dirty oily face and hands, filthy clothes and of course heavy black boots. When Desirie saw this man she immediately panicked that Ava would see him and say something. So she grabbed a shoe off the shelve to distracted Ava. It worked! However, several minutes later while both her and Ava were sitting down trying on shoes, the homeless man walked past them again. Ava looked up as he passed and miraculously said nothing. Desirie was very relieved.
Shortly after, they got in line, paid for their purchases and were just passing the food court on the way out when all of a sudden Desirie heard Ava's voice "Hi, my name is Ava!" Desirie turned in horror to see the scary homeless man smiling at Ava. He said hello back and Desirie quickly left the store. As Desirie buckled Ava in her seat she lectured Ava on not being over friendly with strangers, "Don't speak to strangers Ava! And Never tell them your name!" Ava looked at Desirie and smiled "But Mama, he was SO SO handsome!"

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Thanksgiving 2009

We all had a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner. That is, until Ava wandered into my bedroom and found the wrapped Christmas gifts in my closet. She came and got me, and she wanted to know all about each and every one of the presents. I didn't want to scold her for being nosey, because it was the holiday after all. Big mistake! When she saw the present that was for her, she insisted on opening it right then and there. I told her that it would be more fun to guess about what was inside and then find out if her guess was correct on Christmas Eve. She was having none of it. She told me that we are supposed to get gifts on Thanksgiving. I told her that if I give her her gift now, she won't have anything to open up on Christmas. She told me she was fine with that. I finally had to say no. Thank God Evan came to get her to tell her they were leaving. I guess I'll have to find a new hiding place for the gifts.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Modeling her Winter Wear

She's a cute chubby lady with plenty of attitude!

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

"You Not Laugh At Me"

A rare moment of the Labor Day BBQ, sitting on the lap of Ashley, the woman whose life she had earlier threatened.

I sat around the outdoor table with my family this past labor day chatting with Ashley. We both looked out at the backyard to see Ava chasing around Evan. She was very angry and screamed "AHHHHHH". Ashley and I did what came naturally and laughed to each other about it. But Ava is always aware of the people whose attention she has captured and when she saw us laughing, this made her very very angry! So much that she ran over to the table and screamed at Ashley "You Not Laugh at me!" Ashley was very frightened and shocked, she looked to me and we laughed again, we just couldn't help it. All of a sudden Ava's little chubby arms grabbed a large plastic outdoor chair and raised it above her head "SHUT UP! Or I'll throw this at you!!!" This ws no longer a laughing matter, Ashley looked stunned and I was very upset. My mother witnessed this as well and grabbed the chair from her as I demanded an apology. She was still very angry, "NO I'm Not sorry!" she repeated over and over. Until finally she caved and went over to hug Ashley. I saw the fear in Ashley's eyes as Ava's arms wrapped around the back of her neck. She smiled nervously and Ava said "I sorry".

Monday, November 23, 2009

Doubling up the Tights for Saturday Ballet

Ava getting all dressed for her Saturday Ballet class.

Desirie: "We have double up and put 2 pairs of tights on Ava"
Aunt Jayne: "WHY?"
Desirie: "Because they rip!"

Aunt Jayne: "Ava lose the gum!"

Desirie: "Suck in Ava! Suck in!!"

The split second that Ava held still. "Wait one more it's blurred!"

Ava thinks Luke is coming to see her.

Ava was being difficult as usual, so Luke decided to take matters into his own hands.

Luke stole the show! He shoved Ava right out of the shot.

It ends with a 'Plie'.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Ava's Scary Bonfire Story

One can never just sit around the bonfire without Ava insisting on everyone telling scary stories. So, when it came to her turn to spin her scary tale, here is how it went;

"Once upon a time." " There was a little boy and a little girl walking in the woods." "They heard footsteps behind them." " It was the Prince, but he was a bad and evil Prince!" "He ran at the children! " "The children screamed and ran away!" "Amen."

We all had a really good laugh at the word she chose to end her story. Oh Ava, never stop being you.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Days when they could share the same clothes

Important to note: Ava's thigh is double the size of one of Lily's Arms

Monday, November 16, 2009

Ava in the Green Grass

Just Takin a Cat Nap

February 21st 2008 - Ava making good use of Tigers obesity.

Ava's Baptism Really Made a Splash

Ava was by far the largest baby Desirie ever had. This is a shot from her baptism, My Aunt Monica and her Husband Jim appear to be gasping at the largeness.

Friday, November 13, 2009

A Look Back: The Halloween of "MORE!"

Halloween of 2008

All I can remember from this Halloween was that Yukon Cornelius (Ava) was very insistent on getting as much candy as she could. At each and every house she went to for Trick-or-Treats she requested "MORE". If someone gave her one piece of candy she would reply "Two!" As all the other children were saying "thank you" after receiving their candy, Ava was shouting "MORE!!!" After she would scream this, the home owner usually peered down he sidewalk to see Desirie, my mom and I all looking mortified. But hey, Yukon Cornelius was infatuated with Gold, I guess Ava was just channeling his obsessive personality towards Halloween Candy.

Ava's Favorite Traditional Fall Candy: Porcupines

Desirie was rushing one morning before Halloween to get Ava to preschool.

Ava: I'm Hungry!
Desirie: We don't have time for breakfast right now, we have to get you to school!
Ava: (spots a grocery bag near the front door) What's in that bag?
Desirie: The halloween candy we bought last night (shows her the bag Candy Corn)
Ava: Gimme some of those Porky Pines!

She Always Gives Sound Advice

Desirie and Ava sat eating breakfast one morning at the table. Suddenly Desirie had a sneezing attack. After sneezing about four times in a row, Ava looked over to her mother and very seriously and lovingly said "Be Brave Mama, be very brave."

Ava and The Bug (Worm, Spider, Centipede and Frog) Part Deux

Just last night I called my cousin's house. Her oldest daughter, Emilie answered and said that everyone at home was suffering from the stomach flu (mentioned in entry "Ava and The Bug" below). I could hear Ava yelling in the background and asked to speak with her. I asked her if she had a stomach bug...

Ava: Yeah, I had a bug...but it came out.
Me: Oh, it did? You feel better?
Ava: Yeah there was a bug. And a worm and a spider and a centipede...and a frog.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

It's Preschool Not Prison!

Ava started Preschool this September and her older brother Evan who is in first grade had a lot of questions for her. As they sat on the rug in their living room watching the television, their mother overheard them talking.

Evan: So Ava, do you like Preschool?
Ava: Yeah, it's fun
Evan: Do they let you go to the bathroom by yourself there?
Ava: uh huh
Evan: Really? (Look of surprise) Are you sure they let you go alone?
Ava: (shrugs) Yeah Evan! I didn't kill anybody!

The Taco Bell Flirt

My older sister took her kids into Taco Bell this July. While waiting in line Ava looked over and saw a group of teen boys eating at a table. In classic Ava style she walked right on over to them and said "Hi, my name's Ava! When I grow up, I'm going to drink beer". To which the table of teenage boys broke into laughter.

Ava and the Bug

Ava is battling the stomach flu and Desirie just called to tell me about what Ava just said.

Ava: I'm feeling better mama
Desirie: oh yeah?
Ava: Yeah the bug is out of my stomach....He really liked my stomach! But I can still remember my name.
Desirie: (Looking horrified) WHAT!!
Ava: Yeah, it's Ava!

Ava + Lasagna = Happiness

For Desirie's Birthday this year, my Mom served everyone Lasagna for dinner and made brownies for dessert. We all ate outside on lawn furniture around an outdoor table. Evan and Ava were sitting next to each other. As usual, Ava was chowing down while Evan was pretending to eat. Evan took one bite and claimed her was finished and could have his brownie. Ava was shoveling it in with a big grin on her face. Ava had already finished her first piece and Anna had gone ahead without permission and served her a second. We made an agreement with Evan, that he had to eat 10 more bites and then he could have his brownie.
Around the 5th bite he had forced down, my Mom walked outside to see him gagging and making a big ordeal. She saw his face and said "Alright, you've eaten enough!" After she said this, Ava got a panicked look on her face. Ava started to eat faster and looked very upset. My Mom walked in between the two of them and said "Okay, I'll take your plate!" At this Ava gritted her teeth and let out an anxious noise and said "no no no!", My Mother once more said "Alright, that's good enough Evan, you're done". All of a sudden Ava threw her body back back and screamed "NOOO" as her chair flew backwards with her in it. We all were very shocked, as we saw Ava's worried head poke up from behind the table. We all had a big laugh, but Ava was very mad, "I'm not done! Mormor!" My Mom looked at her very confused, "I was talking to Evan, not you Ava, you can finish." Ava was immediately relieved went right back to enjoying her lasagna.

- Aunt Jayne

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Mama's Bath

One night about a year ago i was experiencing horrible cramps from my period. I decided to run a bath to ease the pain and discomfort. I got in and began to relax. A couple minutes went by and i heard breathing behind the shower curtain. It was Ava pretending to go potty. I told her to get back to bed. She told me that she couldnt sleep and that she wanted to get in with me. I told her that the water was all bloody from my period and that she wouldnt want to get in. She then replied "Mama, red is my favorite color"!!! At that moment I realized that there was no escaping Ava!! She will find you and will always find a way...........

- Mama Desirie

A Baby Doll With Red Eyes

As is typical of most photos of Ava, there is a story to go along with this one. It was around 8am the day before her 4th birthday while we were at a coffeeshop with my dad. One of Ava's favorite pastimes is telling scary stories. The main character in most all of her stories is a "baby doll." Here is the story she shared with us this particular morning:

"One a time, there was a man and he heard a noise in the woods: Beep BEEP BEEP BEEP. And he looked outside and he saw a baby doll with red glowing eyes."

Where Ava's terrifying concoction of a baby doll with red glowing eyes began is--to borrow another Ava-ism--"a mystery."

When Ava was nearing 3 years, she, Evan, my brother Henry and his girlfriend Sydney were walking home from the fire station where we had stopped so Evan and Ava could check out the firetrucks. On the walk home Ava needed a lift so i carried her across my arms so that she was on her back and looking up at the trees and sky. She was inspired to ask me at that moment: "When you was a baby did you have red eyes?"

Months before she posed that bizarre question, she and Evan and I bundled up and took a mid-winter stroll around the neighborhood. When we returned home I told the children to return their things to a basket in the coat closet. Ava went over to the basket but instead of putting her things away, she plucked a naked Barbie doll with ratted hair of the basket and began to chase Evan around the house with it. While she was running she let out a very raspy "AHHH" sound which scared Evan (and me). She chased Evan all the way back to his bedroom where he shut the door and begged her to stop. She flashed a mischevious look back down the hallway to me and before I could get to her to put and end to her shenanigans she pulled one of the Barbie's arms above its head and stuck it under the door repeatedly while letting out her scariest "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH."

- Cousin Lily

Ava's Aim to Takeover a Life

Desirie was driving in her van with the radio on this summer when Ava blurted out what sounded like an aspiration.

(Sound of Woman singing on the radio)
Ava: I want to be her!
Desirie: You want to be a singer when you grow up?
Ava: NO! I Want to BE HER!

- Aunt Jayne

It's Not Easy Being Blue

Halloween fell on a Saturday this year and so I was very excited to go over early and watch as Desirie got the kids ready for trick-or-treating. This year they went as the Smurfs. Ava was a Smurfette, Evan was Papa Smurf and Luke was Baby Smurf. I was in such a rush to go over that I forgot my camera, luckily Desirie needed me to take pictures with hers.

Evan was the first to get ready, being the most cooperative and calm child. His face paint and beard went on and he was already clothed like Papa Smurf. Ava was next and Desirie had started to dress her in the bedroom. I snuck back to see a very round chubby face being painted up like a blueberry. I couldn't stop laughing. Ava had a very serious face on which made it all the more hilarious. As Desirie applied the paint, she talked about how Gargamel had created Smurfette to trick and gain control of the Smurfs, as she repeatedly said "she was the most beautiful thing the smurfs had ever seen and she had the most beautiful blonde hair!", Ava was gazing off into oblivion, maybe dreaming about magical blonde flowing hair. Desirie added some ruby red lip gloss and picked up a white jumper made of felt. Immediately she looked at me with a realization, that she was now going to have to attempt to pull this white dress over Ava's large blue head.

I of course had to assist. I instructed Ava to hold her arms up above her as straight as possible, Ava started panicking. "Will it come off!? Will it come off!!!?" I had to guess that she was referring to her face paint rubbing off on the dress. I assured her and Desirie started to lower the dress covering Ava. Half way down Avas arms went forward and she started shaking. "ABORT!" I screamed, as we lifted the dress back off her. I tried calming her down and she frantically screamed "AHHAHAHAHHAHAHA". This scenario happened once more again and I was at my wits end. I looked her directly in the eye and in a commanding voice I told her to close her eyes and keep her arms against her ears, and that I would do the rest. Desirie lowered the dress, Ava gave a bit of a struggle and we quickly tugged it as fast as possible fearing Ava would start flailing her arms inside the dress and rip it open. We were successful yet Ava was very upset still and started screaming about a smudge of blue face paint on her left hand. I assured her it would wash off, but she was freaking out.

On went the wig, and the white cap. Smurfette Ava was hilarious, she looked perfect. We all smiled and complimented her, but the expression on her face was unenthusiastic and she let out a loud scream. I sat her down and told her that no one would want to give her candy if she acted bratty all night. Evan happened to be getting something out of the closet and chimed in "But I'm good, so I'll get candy! Right?" I shot him look and smiled suspiciously "You sure do like to let us know you're the good kid!" It was true, he was the easy child.

So outside the little Smurfs marched following their Aunt Jayne with their mothers camera. They posed in the bushes outside and got very into it. Ava let out a scream every so often about her hair or not liking a sibling standing so close to her. Their cat Chewy was climbing up the front screen door as we stood on the porch. Ava became frantic, screaming "HIS CLAWS! He's HURTING HIS CLAWS!" A little while later Emilie sat next to Ava on the porch and their knees touched, Ava let out a whale of a scream. That neighborhood must be going nuts.

I talked to Ava about trying to be more relaxed and not so on edge, I told her she was a kid, that she was going to have a fun night, and she should be happy. At this, she looked off into space again and I snapped the shot above. I don't know what was in the air that day, but Ava was definitely in a crab apple mood. Her mood lasted long into the night during Trick-or-Treating as she muttered such lines like "Getta outta here", "UGHHHH" and "I can't take this anymore!". I don't what Kermit the frog was saying when he sang the song "It's not easy being green" because from what I could gather from my niece Ava, "It's no easier being Blue".

- Aunt Jayne

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Cider Mill Memories

"shes pissed because she didnt know how to hold the donut in the napkin...and desiries camera was going dead and she was getting pissed off so i said ava, just say cheese and she yelled it at the top of her lungs and said cheese and everyone was starring at us!! haha!" - Aunt Anna

Phone Chats with Ava...

I told Ava that she has a Blog, and she said "I have a Baby".

- Aunt Jayne

"My Belly Button Hurts"

Ava walked into the living room and cried out to her mother one late evening. Desirie turned to Ava who looked distraught. Desirie was concerned. The scenario went like this.

Ava: Mama, my bellybutton hurts!
Desirie: Ava! What did you do?
(Ava is silent)
Desirie: Ava! You have to tell me what you did!
Ava: I stuck a Crayon in it and Stirred

-Aunt Jayne

Mac Photobooth

Taken when Ava was 3. Hilarious...Ava was so bothered when we put this on, she got very angry and we had to take it off. She thought her head actually looked like this!

- Aunt Jayne

Sunday Morning Vanity

Sunday morning 7am: I wake up to Ava staring me directly in the eyes leaning on the side of my bed: "Get me a drink" is all she says in a very demanding, angry tone meant to scare me into submission. I suggested she get back in bed and we take a little snooze which she would have none of. She repeated her demand and I obliged, got out of bed and got her an orange juice. After this we returned to bed to read stories. There we were, laughing at the main character in the children's classic, "Harry the Dirty Dog," who runs away from home to escape the bathtub but realizes his family loves him and evetually returns home, filthy and hops in the tub. Attempting to make the story time as engaging as possible, I turned to Ava and asked her, "What do you wanna be when you grow up?" Below is the ensuing conversation...

Ava: I don't wanna grow up.
Me: Well, Ava, honey, everyone has to grow up. It can be fun!
Ava: No. I don't wanna grow up. [Tears begin to well in her eyes and a brief pause] What am I gonna look like?
Me: You're going to be a beautiful girl and tall just like your mom!
Ava: I don't wanna be tall! I just wanna be AVA! [Then she picks up a lock of her hair, gets teary again] Am I still gonna have my blonde hair?

- Cousin Lily

Ava goes to the Doctor

Taking my niece Ava out in public is always a risk, because of her unpredictability. Of course this is something my older sister has to deal with everyday. Early this summer, my older sister took Ava,her 4th born along with her to the doctors office for her 5th born, Luke's routine checkup.

While waiting for the doctor in an exam room, a nurse decided to get friendly with Ava. She probably saw the blonde hair, round blue eyes, chubby face and innocent smile and thought, this child looks harmless. Little did she know that Ava's appearance is very deceiving.

The nurse raised the pitch of her voice to speak to Ava in a perky and overly happy tone, "is your name Ava?" she asked. Ava nodded and answered "yeah". The nurse got perkier, "WOW! That's a pretty name, did you know that I have a daughter named Eva, and she has an older sister named Megan, they are around your age...". As the nurse went on, the wheels and gears started to turn in Ava's little noggin. It is important to know that Ava hardly ever meets people like this woman, her mother is hardly ever that perky, most of us being more sarcastic and real, she started to get very irritated by this woman who was talking to her like she was a baby. So as the woman was midsentence in her sickeningly perky chatter of " did you know that I have a daughter named Eva, and she has an older sister named Megan, they are around ..." Ava looked up at this woman and stated "I don't care". The nurse was immediately taken aback. My sister Desirie was mortified. The nurse smiled awkwardly and left the exam room. Ava sat casually on the exam, totally unaware of doing anything wrong.

After seeing the doctor, they waited for some paperwork to go through out in the main waiting room as Ava sat at a small table and colored on blank pieces of construction paper. The doctor came out and handed some things to my sister Desirie and looked down at the picture Ava was drawing. "Wow That's great, who is that a picture of?" Ava answered, "My Mama". The doctor smiled, "Well that's beautiful drawing!" To which Ava looked up at the doctor and replied "No it's not! It's Disgusting!" The doctor was of course shocked and probably a little scared but smiled. Desirie was by that time desperate to get out of the doctors office as quickly as possible. Ava was again clueless she had said anything out of the ordinary. It was just another day in the life of Ava.

- Aunt Jayne

This Blog is Dedicated to Ava...

Ava is truly a one of a kind little girl. She's outspoken, bold, spunky and full of life. You can always count on Ava to say something you'd never expect to hear out of a 4 year old. She is full of emotion and thoughts and just wants to express them. This Blog was created to document all of Ava's finest moments.