Kids say the darndest things...but nothing comes close to Ava

Ava has recently given a review of her entire blog. She went over it with me this past Sunday and I am happy to share all of her thoughts and feelings.

Cousin Lily and Ava
(Squealed) "IILY!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Babycakes
(With a burst of excitement)"That's me Makin!"..."I'm Makin"

Roll it, pat it, and mark it with an A
"I'm more Makin!"

The little Bride
"I was scared"

Ava is the green grass
"Look! That's me in the Grass!"

Ava's baptism really made a splash
Simply shook her head and refused to believe she ever looked like this!

Mac Photobooth
Ava got very upset, expecially when all I said was "Your head looked very different when you were little".

Threats from a 4 year old

This past Sunday I celebrated my 23rd Birthday with my family. It was a joy to see my nephews and nieces. I hadn't been able to see them all month because of the illness present in their home. Evan was a joy to see, he even wore his suit for the party because he wanted to look special for me. I got to show Ava and Evan their blogs and they were full of interest and comments. Ava refused to believe that the baptismal picture was actually her. She was most fond of the Babycake pictures of her at her play kitchen. Upon first seeing them she gasped and exclaimed "That's me Makin!"...."I'm Makin!".

Ava was very pushy while she ate her dinner, demanded someone cut her food and get her multiple glasses of root beer, that kind of thing. Her older Sister Emilie mentioned Strawberry milk and I responded with a comment on how the thought of it makes me ill. Ava was furious! "WHAT!" she screamed and slammed down her fork, "Strawberry milk is not make me ill, it makes me good!" I smiled at her, half scared for my life.

Later while opening my gifts, my Mom sat directly next to me. As she was about to hand me the present from my Dad and herself, Ava got in her face. Ava looked at my mother with a very stern and serious face. "You let me hand that gift or I'm going to ruin Jayne's birthday!" My Mom was speechless. Of course my Mom wasn't about to give in to Ava's threat. I think she was left deeply concerned is all.

After cake Desirie told all the kids to grab their coats and get ready to leave. Ava went down to the family room and went up to Ashley (Nicks girlfriend). She told Ashley she was going to give her a kiss, but she had to close her eyes. Ashley looked nervous. Ava started to inch closer to her cheek but noticed everyone was watching. "Nobody Look!!" she shouted. Ashley was very scared. Perhaps she thought Ava was going to put something in her ear. Ava inched very slowly to the side of Ashley's face and Ashley peeked. Luckily Ava didn't notice and gave her a peck. They have always had a very shaky relationship.

Now We Know the Trick!

Evan got Swine Flu this past weekend and it developed into Pnemonia. My Mom and Anna brought over a Gatorade for Evan and Ava went ballistic.

Ava: Where is something for me?!!!
MorMor: Ava, Evan is sick!
Ava: I WANT SOMETHING!!!! AAHHGG
Aunt Anna: Hey Ava? Can I squeeze your belly?
(Ava turns around and goes from totally enraged to totally enthused)
Ava: SUUURE!!!!

Another Target Story

Desirie was on the toy aisle with Ava. Ava had picked up a toy aquarium and started begging for it.

Desirie: Ava put that back, we already have a toy like that at home
Ava: ehhh!
Desirie: Put it back!
Ava: (sighs) Okay! (starts slowly walking to put it back)

(she see's a target employee at the end of the aisle and hurries over to him)

Ava: Will you put this back for me? (bats her lashes)
Target Employee: Sure
Ava: Thanks
(As Ava is about to walk back to Desirie, she turns to employee and smirks)
Ava: My mama gets me whatever I want!

Little Old Lady

Ava had just started Preschool and one morning on the car ride to school, Desirie decided to ask Ava about her new friends.

Desirie: So Ava, I know you're friends are Sarah, Amy, Nicole and Marie, but what is that little boys name that you play with?
Ava: "I dunno, but he sure is a cute little guy"

Ava and the Handsome Target Stranger

My older sister Desirie told me this story this past summer. She was pushing Ava in a shopping cart while she was browsing the shoe aisle of Target when she heard very loud squeaky footsteps along side of her. When she turned to look, she saw a very terrifying man. She described him as a look-a-like to the homeless criminal in the 1990's Dennis the Menace Movie. If you can imagine the stringy hair,dirty oily face and hands, filthy clothes and of course heavy black boots. When Desirie saw this man she immediately panicked that Ava would see him and say something. So she grabbed a shoe off the shelve to distracted Ava. It worked! However, several minutes later while both her and Ava were sitting down trying on shoes, the homeless man walked past them again. Ava looked up as he passed and miraculously said nothing. Desirie was very relieved.
Shortly after, they got in line, paid for their purchases and were just passing the food court on the way out when all of a sudden Desirie heard Ava's voice "Hi, my name is Ava!" Desirie turned in horror to see the scary homeless man smiling at Ava. He said hello back and Desirie quickly left the store. As Desirie buckled Ava in her seat she lectured Ava on not being over friendly with strangers, "Don't speak to strangers Ava! And Never tell them your name!" Ava looked at Desirie and smiled "But Mama, he was SO SO handsome!"

Thanksgiving 2009

We all had a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner. That is, until Ava wandered into my bedroom and found the wrapped Christmas gifts in my closet. She came and got me, and she wanted to know all about each and every one of the presents. I didn't want to scold her for being nosey, because it was the holiday after all. Big mistake! When she saw the present that was for her, she insisted on opening it right then and there. I told her that it would be more fun to guess about what was inside and then find out if her guess was correct on Christmas Eve. She was having none of it. She told me that we are supposed to get gifts on Thanksgiving. I told her that if I give her her gift now, she won't have anything to open up on Christmas. She told me she was fine with that. I finally had to say no. Thank God Evan came to get her to tell her they were leaving. I guess I'll have to find a new hiding place for the gifts.

Ava goes to the Doctor

Taking my niece Ava out in public is always a risk, because of her unpredictability. Of course this is something my older sister has to deal with everyday. Early this summer, my older sister took Ava,her 4th born along with her to the doctors office for her 5th born, Luke's routine checkup.

While waiting for the doctor in an exam room, a nurse decided to get friendly with Ava. She probably saw the blonde hair, round blue eyes, chubby face and innocent smile and thought, this child looks harmless. Little did she know that Ava's appearance is very deceiving.

The nurse raised the pitch of her voice to speak to Ava in a perky and overly happy tone, "is your name Ava?" she asked. Ava nodded and answered "yeah". The nurse got perkier, "WOW! That's a pretty name, did you know that I have a daughter named Eva, and she has an older sister named Megan, they are around your age...". As the nurse went on, the wheels and gears started to turn in Ava's little noggin. It is important to know that Ava hardly ever meets people like this woman, her mother is hardly ever that perky, most of us being more sarcastic and real, she started to get very irritated by this woman who was talking to her like she was a baby. So as the woman was midsentence in her sickeningly perky chatter of " did you know that I have a daughter named Eva, and she has an older sister named Megan, they are around ..." Ava looked up at this woman and stated "I don't care". The nurse was immediately taken aback. My sister Desirie was mortified. The nurse smiled awkwardly and left the exam room. Ava sat casually on the exam, totally unaware of doing anything wrong.

After seeing the doctor, they waited for some paperwork to go through out in the main waiting room as Ava sat at a small table and colored on blank pieces of construction paper. The doctor came out and handed some things to my sister Desirie and looked down at the picture Ava was drawing. "Wow That's great, who is that a picture of?" Ava answered, "My Mama". The doctor smiled, "Well that's beautiful drawing!" To which Ava looked up at the doctor and replied "No it's not! It's Disgusting!" The doctor was of course shocked and probably a little scared but smiled. Desirie was by that time desperate to get out of the doctors office as quickly as possible. Ava was again clueless she had said anything out of the ordinary. It was just another day in the life of Ava.

- Aunt Jayne